Hellooo pretty little ponies! 

I'm currently in school having English classsssssss. I don't mind English, as it's a language that I'm very comfortable with. Almost more than Norwegian, especially in creative writing. It just sounds so much better, you know? There are more pretty words in English than Norwegian, in my opinion. But anyhow. 

Lately I've been thinking of my future more. I have a hard time living in the moment, thus I often feel like I'm standing still while the world moves on without me. As if time is never moving around me. It's quite the awful feeling. 

I've been looking at things and goals that I hope to achieve within the next 10 years. These things are different than just having a dream. They're goals, quite doable in some of the cases. Things like getting my own place and travel to certain places. Those are things I could actually see happening, thus they feel closer than the faint dreams so far up there. 

In English class we're going to be tested about Braveheart, Scotland and that whole independence stuff. I have a hard time sitting down and actually read the blocks of articles, mainly because I just can't focus. I feel so hyped about trying to reach some of these goals and dreams, I can't possible focus on reading history and politics. 

The other day I was about to write a post about friendship. It was mostly going to be a rant, as I have some thoughts and feelings that I chose to not address for the most part. I would rather not confront problems with friends because it's just so much easier to take it and move on. I don't like arguments or conflicts at all, thus I often get ... well, stepped on. I'm a pushover, or just dumb and nice. I might not seem like a pushover nor a too nice person, but I am just a whole bunch of mush that does as asked. I don't always do it with a smile, but I think most of my friends would agree that they can come to me if they need help or so. 

It's not that I don't appreciate that role. It feels good knowing that people can rely on you. It just sucks when you can't rely in them in return. When I make an effort to take care of my friends, help them out and all that, then I wish someone would to that for me. 

Since my friends sometimes refer to me as a "mom" figure, let's take that as an example. Your mom takes care of you, right? She gives you food, makes sure you don't screw up your life too much and all that. Even when you turn 18 and she can't actually boss you around more, she does her best to help out whenever you allow her to. But how much do you take care of your mom? I'm not saying that she can't take care of herself, but I think most people like being taken care of to some degree. 

At least I do. I love being taken care of soooo much, it's just the best feeling in the world. It's just that since I take care of others, they might not think that I need to be taken care of as well. 

Sigh. 

I wasn't actually going to rant about this now, but oh well it happened. 

Let's move on with out day then.

Byeee~